Sunday, January 10, 2010

Day 1. January 10th, 2010

I had many things to think about after seeing a doctor that specializes in Holistic Medicine. He was making inquires and asking me questions that over my experience of seeing doctors, have never asked. . I was so impressed at just the amount of time he spent learning about me. I was told that I am angry. That whatever angers me is keeping me from a good quality of life. I agreed. I think the doctor was surprised that in our first meeting, I was able to see his point of view, and come to many realizations, I have seen before but never wanted to believe.
I am an angry person, I guess by nature. Since I was in high school, I can always remember holding onto situations, from the past and never fully allowing myself to just "let go".
I have been suffering with migraines since the age of 19. Over the years, I have been struggling with many aliments, a wide range of problems.
I was diagnosed having Aleopecia when I was 24. The experience was awful. I remember one day driving in my car on Route 17, when I just happened to look in the mirror, and what I saw "scared the hell out of me". Hair was literally coming out in clumps. I knew something seriously was wrong. I immediately called my mother, whom at the time had been living in Rutherford, NJ. She was of course her usual calm self, very soothing, and told me not to worry. I remember thinking I was sick, cancer, oh the thoughts perusing through my mind....were endless. You see I have always considered myself to be a very analytical person. Very inquisitive at the very least.

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